Perhaps one titled, “Making Everyone You Love Happy and Tending to Your Own Needs Simultaneously”
My mother tells me
that when I meet someone I like,
I have to ask them three questions:
1. what are you afraid of?
2. do you like dogs?
3. what do you do when it rains?
of those three, she says the first one is the most important.
“They gotta be scared of something, baby. Everybody is. If they aren’t afraid of anything, then they don’t believe in anything, either.”
I met you on a Sunday, right
one look and my heart fell into
my stomach like a trap door.
on our second date,
I asked you what you were afraid of.
“spiders, mostly. being alone. little children, like, the ones who just learned how to push a kid over on the playground. oh and space. holy shit, space.”
I asked you if you liked dogs.
“I have three.”
I asked you what you do when it rains.
“sleep, mostly. sometimes I sit at the window and watch the rain droplets race. I make a shelter out of plastic in my backyard for all the stray animals; leave them food and a place to sleep.”
he smiled like he knew.
like his mom told him the same
“how about you?”
I’m scared of everything.
of the hole in the o-zone layer,
of the lady next door who never
smiles at her dog,
and especially of all the secrets
the government must be breaking
it’s back trying to keep from us.
I love dogs so much, you have no idea.
I sleep when it rains.
I want to tell everyone I love them.
I want to find every stray animal and bring them home.
I want to wake up in your hair
and make you shitty coffee
and kiss your neck
and draw silly stick figures of us.
I never want to ask anyone else
It makes me really happy sometimes,
Because when I think of you,
I don’t picture your face or your words,
No, to me,
You’ve always been all sweat and smiles.
I just don’t know how people write in dating profiles seriously because when I see a box labeled “tell us a little about yourself” all I can think to write is ‘firmly grasp it’.
I have a birth control related appointment on Tuesday and I have been debating about going off my current pill and perhaps trying a new method mostly IUD, although an implant might work well too. Either way I am stressed out about how my body will react to either. I’m a bit hesitant about changing because I feel like my body is use to the hormones and might start to hate me without them.
If anyone is knowledgeable about this stuff and has some advice to throw my way I’d appreciate it.